Free Things & Freedom
As a blogger and podcaster who listens and learns from other bloggers and podcasters, I am well aware of the messages being sent around via social media regarding quarantining. Many of the communities I'm involved with seem to preach two overarching messages in regards to what the collective "we" should be doing:
1. Use this time wisely & get things done
2. Use this time to rest & reflect
Ultimately, the binary of these two options is extremely transferrable to the way each one of us navigates our regular day-to-day lives. It comes down to a matter of what we value in life. However, as someone who values health and safety equally with productivity and opportunity, I find it quite difficult to occupy the space of unstructured time. All at once I want to sleep and recover and also write the next great screen play.
With resourcefulness being one of my best skills, I've accumulated an overwhelming amount of internet based resources to help me occupy my time. However, the question I'm asking myself now is not: "What can I do in this time?" but "What should I do in this time?"
Despite all of the binary-focused media out there, I'm going to honestly lay out what I have done and what I actually feel like doing. If you struggle with sleep and mental health like I do, I'm sure you can relate to the second list. I share these thoughts as a way of saying it's definitely okay to be confused about your role in all of this time. I'm certainly confused about what I should be doing. Hopefully you'll see that I, like many other 20 somethings, are straddling the gray area between being totally lost and feeling totally free.
A list of free resources I've utilized:
Headspace, an excellent mental health app that is now free
Downdog, a customizable yoga app that used to be subscription based
All of YouTube, to watch SNL, educational videos, and stupid things to feel better
Podcasts, but I stick to my safe usuals: To L And Back, Queery, The Daily, & Punch Up The Jam
Digital Library Card, because libraries are closed and I'm struggling without hardbacks
Online classes through coursera.com
Online Shows/Webinars-anything from drag to entrepreneurship to author talk backs
Zoom-we are all using it now, obviously
Zencastr-a podcasting platform that now has more functions for free
Church-the many churches I am/have been a part of host daily activities, all free
Online games- Sims, Roller Coaster Tycoon, Nancy Drew, Cards Against Humanity, you name it
A list of things I actually want to do with my free time:
Write poetry-my goal is to be like Emily Dickinson I suppose
Do splatter paint art-just take rainbow paints to my blank walls
Bake with as much chocolate as possible
Sleep more- like 3 hour naps in the afternoon
Scroll through TikTok- I was pressured into getting one and I kinda don't regret it
Re-watch The Crown, one of my favs
Learn all of Hayley Kiyoko's "Curious" dance- it will honestly take 3 months
Lie on my back and think-the most alluring of all of the options
In the next few days I would like to find balance, but realistically I probably won't find harmony or a sense of structure for another few weeks. I always search for a middle ground, especially when it comes to daily life. How can I peacefully integrate both of these goals into my weeks? I'm not sure. But I'll be ready to share when I figure it out.